The Wheel of the Year turns today and so it feels appropriate on this Samhain, to share with you my year long journey with my ancestors and how their support has impacted me and changed my life. The veil between worlds is thin at Samhain, so it is the ideal time to commune with our ancestors. Over the past year, I have consciously increased my connection with my own ancestors, with the vision of healing my maternal ancestral line. I would like to share this journey around the Wheel of the Year, with the intention that it may inspire those who read this story to collaborate with their ancestors for insight, healing and direction.
The initial phase of working with my ancestors began last October whilst attending a woman's retreat in Shropshire. During the weekend, the spirit of my maternal grandmother connected with me. I had never had the pleasure of meeting her in real life, but I was aware that she had suffered much trauma in life. When I returned home, I continued to work with my grandmothers spirit through shamanic journeys, guided meditations and in circle. Realisations gracefully emerged in relation to her trauma and the resulting beliefs, emotional patterns and self-protective behaviours, she had adopted to survive. It soon became apparent to me, that my mother and I had inherited these and that it was time for us all to be liberated from these restrictive energies.
Upon reflection, some of my childhood behaviours now seemed logical rather than illogical. I always felt wary of other people, even friends, as if I was waiting for the day that they would betray me. As my grandmother was betrayed by my grandfather this now made sense to me. I had adopted self-isolation as a coping strategy when feeling overwhelmed, uncomfortable or challenged. My grandmother had been isolated from society when admitted to a mental hospital where she lived for many years until being relocated to sheltered accomodation, where she later died. Isolation serves me when I need to rest, but not when it is a triggered response. I knew this was an aspect for me to work with.
There were many more revelations during that which led to healing for myself and my maternal line. It was interesting to observe how these had impacted my life growing up and how some were covertly continuing to inhibit my life. Each healing experience, gifted further insights, understanding and clarity, as well as a deep sense of peace. I began to recognise the outdated narrative, so that I could re-write a new pone for myself.
The healing journey with my grandmother, came to a natural conclusion in May this year. I returned to the lands in Shropshire, the place our journey together began the previous year. I spent 3 days in circle with my sisters, some who were with me the previous year and some who were new to me. It was a truly transformational weekend. During a shamanic journey, the ancestors of the roundhouse at the retreat, welcomed my grandmother into their tribe. They reassured her that she was safe to trust them, they acknowledged her psychic gifts and demonstrated their acceptance of her. This gifted me internal peace and a sense that I could now move on.
Upon completion of this cycle, new energies began to emerge that encouraged me to journey further back in my ancestral line and heal the witch wound. During this time, I realised that my energy blueprint was holding inherited limiting beliefs about being seen, emotional trauma of betrayal, as well as fear of accusation, persecution and death. It became evident that these energies had caused an unconscious internal rejection of myself. Once cleared however, I felt capable of embracing and fully stepping into my Medicine Woman essence.
I would like to take a moment to acknowledge and honour my ancestors. I trust that the positive impact of our healing journey, will ripple into the blood and bones of future generations, including that of my two incredible children. I offer deep gratitude to each and every one of them. It has been through their regular guidance and consistent support, that I have gained clarity and found the courage to create The Medicine Tent®.
In honour of the healing I've experienced, I am hosting an online Live circle on Sunday 5th November at 7pm GMT. As a launch special you can use the following code to receive 50% discount. Add LAUNCH-MAIL at checkout.
Wheel Of The Year ArtWork: Kristen Fox
Celtic Roundhouse Photo: The Medicine Tent®
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